Doof in the Garden
I’ve heard the phrase “act your age” my entire life. Now that I’m nearly 39, it’s still echoing through my canyon, but it’s started to trigger a specific question: How exactly do you act YOUR age?
I pay a mortgage, but so do some 19-year-old phenoms. I can drive, but so can my teenage niece. I don’t digest milk well, so I suppose I have that going for me. But considering there are 39-year-old heroin addicts and 39-year-old astronauts, I feel like I’m technically crushing it.
"Act your age" is one of those holding phrases—a vague, lazy bit of shorthand used in the hopes that an intention will bleed through better than the actual words.
But for the sake of the argument—and my father—let’s explore. I am currently 38 years old and have been for a little over six months. Consider this my mid-year performance evaluation.
The Stats:
Married: Yes.
Full-time salary job: Yes.
Homeowner: Yes.
Kids: No.
Traveled: Extensively.
By every metric of "adulthood," I’ve checked the boxes. Yet, the phrase persists. It’s about how I carry myself, for sure. I don’t even blame people for the label; a loud man who asks too many questions can easily appear a bit... doofy.
There is a social expectation that by 39, you should have traded curiosity for stoicism and volume for gravity. But this isn’t a rebellion against social graces. I can wear a tailored jacket and wipe my mouth with the best of them. It’s more about the realization that being a bit uncouth can unlock something for the people around you. At the very least, it informs the world that you aren’t shy about being yourself.
Acting your age shouldn't mean surrendering your imagination. As Miyamoto Musashi famously said, "It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war."
I’ll keep the mortgage and the "crushing it" stats. But I’m keeping the questions and the doofy energy, too. I’d rather be the warrior who knows how to play in the garden than the gardener who forgot how to fight for his own personality.
Besides, in six months I’m 39, and that’s a whole new age to figure out.
Word Count: ~415 words
Approximate Read Time: 1 minute, 50 seconds